On the topic of gratitude

Where I come from, Christmas is, once the most festive part of it is over, a quiet time.
For me, it's also a time for reflection. A time to be grateful for all the things I have in my life that make it a pleasure to get up every morning and to venture into the day, be it a weekday or a holiday.
If I may be allowed to become a little personal here: Not least, it is impossible not to be grateful to all the wonderful people that I surround myself with. Whether it's family that has been the closest and most intimate part of my life for as long as we are able to remember; close friends, whom I have known for decades; or newer friends, who I wish that I had come to know much earlier than I have - all of you are dear to my life; In your own way, each of you have helped turn the year that is now coming to an end into an excellent year, and I look forward to maintaining and expanding our relationships and friendships in the future.
I don't mention any of you specifically, but no one should feel forgotten. You all know who you are, and I can not even start to thank you as you deserve. I look forward to interact with you in the time to come.
(Translated from Noget om taknemmelighed)

Listen!

At some point, I read a text written by a person who had a habit of falling into deep thoughts. Not necessarily useless thoughts; but at least thoughts that were not needed at the moment. For the same reason, one of the person's simplest and most effective work tools was a post-it note, which in all its simplicity said "Wake Up!"
It made me think about my own situation. I have previously assumed that I am an ambivert - that is, (though I am most often an introvert) in certain situations, I can be perceived as extremely extrovert and therefore have difficulties making it possible for introvert people in my surroundings to be heard. And because I in certain contexts am dependent on having to work with introvert people, I've made a similar trick with a post-it note that I carry in the journal that I try to bring with me at all times. I do not try to claim that it always works, but it often makes me remember something that I sometimes neglect.
However, my note does not say "Wake up!" It says "Listen!"
(Translated from Lyt!, originally published April 30th, 2017)

Vacationing with a clean conscience

In some circles, it seems that managers consider it a good idea to be a role model, spending time working during vacation periods like the upcoming Christmas holidays. Apparently with the purpose to give the people they manage a good example to follow, spending some time themselves, thus increasing the overall productivity.
However, I'm afraid it's just not a good idea at all - on the contrary, it might rather be a bad idea. Vacations are not intended for work. Vacations are meant to be days off for the vacationing person. Time to spend to recover - recharge oneself physically and mentally to be able to once again perform optimally when returning to work and the daily life. And often, it will prove to be a better investment to let employees keep a clean conscience while doing nothing productive at all during vacations, rather than pushing them to squeeze some extra hours out of them, thereby only achieving a lower overall performance.
But this of course demands the ability to see the bigger picture.
(Translated from: Ferie med ren samvittighed)

Stray thought on leadership

It's scary how many people believe that when you are a leader, people are there to serve you - when in reality, it is the exact opposite way around: you are there to serve people.
(Translated from Strøtanke om lederskab)

On the topic of friends and haters

The other day, I came across a quote, which made me think. Actually, I think there is a lot of things to think about in the simple one-liner: “if your friends no longer serve your interests, ditch them, they have become haters".
One thing is: what kind of friends are these? Among true friends: sometimes I serve your interest, sometimes you serve mine, sometimes we are too absorbed with our own problems to serve any other interests than our own - but in general, over time, our mutual sum of interests are better served when we do it together as friends than they would have been, had we not been friends. That a friend for some time does not serve my interests does not automatically make her a hater - what has the risk of turning her into a hater is if I started seeing her as such. If the "friendship" is of a more superficial kind, there might of course be some truth in it - but seeing friends as a commodity that can be ditched (and perhaps even replaced with more superficial friendships) if they don't serve my interests will not end me up with really trusted friends that I can turn to anytime if the going gets tough. The interesting thing is: most of us have old friends that we might not be in touch with as frequently as we once were (and we might not actively serve each other's interest as much as we once did) - but if we really needed them, they would come to our rescue without asking a single question. That they do not continuously serve our interests does not make them lesser friends than before. Just as I am not a lesser friend even if I do not continuously serve their interests - I will be there for them without hesitation, when they really need me.
Another thing is: if friends really become haters (and I do not see this as happening just because for some time they do not serve my interests) - why does this happen? I think it is always relevant to find the underlying reason - as it might be something I have done that made this happen, and therefore, I should perhaps better my ways rather than ditch the people who cared for and trusted the better version who once was me. Otherwise, it might just turn more friends into haters and I will end up becoming a very lonesome person.
But sure - if friends really become haters for no apparent reason, the end of the friendship can be a very possible consequence.
And of course - the underlying question that I should have addressed up front, I see now: what does it mean "to serve my interests" - is it something that my friends actively do - or is it enough that they do not work against my interests? I personally think that the latter is quite sufficient, I can even understand it, if my friends work against my interests from time to time. Maybe this is a sign for me that my interests are not always optimal?
But the one-liner “if your friends no longer serve your interests, ditch them, they have become haters" I find dangerous. It might very well cause people to ditch what they should have cherished as long-term trusted friendships.
Translated from "Noget om venner og modstandere"

No pain, ...

At some point, I was made aware of a quote by Søren Kierkegaard from his text "The Sickness Unto Death":

So it is too that in the eyes of the world it is dangerous to venture. And why? Because one may lose. But not to venture is shrewd. And yet, by not venturing, it is so dreadfully easy to lose that which it would be difficult to lose in even the most venturesome venture, and in any case never so easily, so completely as if it were nothing...one's self. For if I have ventured amiss--very well, then life helps me by its punishment. But if I have not ventured at all--who then helps me?

Apart from the fact that I seem to be certain of punishment, regardless whether I dare or not - I'm not entirely able to accept that - it's one of the most beautiful formulations of a "pull yourself together". If I dare, I become wiser and may even win more than that; If I dare and fail, I will nevertheless (if you read it in the right way) be able to use the punishment of life as a help. (If you read the Danish original in a more pessimistic way, life's help could simply be to give me the punishment).
The one who does not dare may win earthly benefits of gaining comfort through cowardice, but he will none the less, according to Kierkegaard, lose himself.
(Translated from Hvo intet vinder..., originally published October 16th, 2014)

Perfect Strangers

If you are struggling to come up with ideas for what to do next time you assemble a networking group, I would like to put forward an idea that I have been toying around with: what if the individual participants were given the assignment: Everyone will a companion, preferably of the innovative kind, who must not know (or be known to) anyone else in the original group of people. This gives you the opportunity to add new perspectives to the topics you are occupied by, and provide fresh air to the network.
 As far as I can see, the idea could be used in several contexts where you may be interested in breaking up old habits and bringing innovation into a more or less established group. If someone out there tries it out, I would be delighted to hear about your experience.
(Translated from Perfect Strangers, originally published May 31st, 2016)

Networking and mirroring

Over the years, I have been so fortunate that I have built a network  and surrounded myself with some excellent people who sometimes pay me compliments that I have a hard time listening to without blushing - because I actually think I'm told such nice things that I'm having trouble recognizing myself in the words.
But there is one thing that is really important to remember when it comes to networking and its effect: you reap as you sow. If you experience something good from my side, it's mainly because I have an excellent network. The good I can do, I am able to do because I'm inspired to do it by an excellent network.
So when the compliments sometimes are a little too much for me to fully recognize myself in them, I am pleased that they are basically compliments that I can just as well reflect onto the people who inspires me to whatever good I am able to do.
(Translated from Netværk og spejleffekt)